Why Have I Never Tried: Chunky?

[Photographs: Robyn Lee]

Ed. Note: When's the last time you tried a new candy—just because? For the SE staff, that time is now. Each day for the two weeks leading up to Halloween, we will try a candy we haven't had before, and tell the tale.

Despite the fact that I've just gotten my 7th cavity filled at 27 years old (are there even that many teeth that can GET cavities? I'm starting to think I've doubled up...) I will proudly proclaim the fact that I love candy. Whether it be of the bar variety or a bag full of pieces, be it chocolate-y, peanut butter-y, gummy, sour, fruity or marshmallow-y—I am an absolute fool for it.

My childhood was pretty much devoid of candy, which probably contributes to this fact. I'll never forget my first day of college, when in my gleeful freedom I bought a bag of sour peach rings. "I'll keep these in my desk," I thought to myself with a sneaky smile, "and have a few whenever I feel like it—cause I'm an adult and I can!" I got back to my room and ripped open the bag. After a modest amount, I stuck them in a drawer. 30 seconds later I opened the drawer for a few more. A minute after that, the drawer was opened again. The bottom line: the bag was finished in about 10 minutes, and the experiment failed. I'm not allowed to be near candy unmonitored.


When Sweets editor Carrie sent forth the decree to try candies we've never had before, I was extremely excited at the prospect.Though I've spent the latter years of my life making up for my candy-less childhood, there are still plenty of candy bars that are a mystery to me. Most are of the caramel-peanut-nougat variety, and while I considered selecting one of those to try, my mind came back to a strange little bar called Chunky.

The Chunky fascinates me. The name alone made it worthy of my selection. And what about that early 90s outfit it's wearing? Those power-suit pinstripes, that clunky font! Chunky feels no need to keep up with the times—it's confident in its retro-self!

The package reads: milk chocolate with peanuts and raisins. Immediately I was disapointed —I'm not a raisin gal. And the thought of some probably sub-par milk chocolate with nothing but peanuts standing between me and my wrinkly enemies was not an appealing thought. But I forged on.

Want to know something weird? I really liked Chunky! Despite the fact that no one else in the office did, ("Tastes like raisins...and chalk," said Max), despite the fact that it was nothing new, I still somehow enjoyed it! I think the key lies in the name—the chunk. The height and heft of the bar creates a satisfying feeling when you sink your teeth into it. The milk chocolate sort of crumbles, offering the occasional surprise of salty peanuts and raisins, which surprisingly did not offend me and in fact added a pleasant texture. Yes, Max, the bar is a bit chalky, but then I guess I kind of like that kind of crumbly, chalky chocolate.

Rock on, you crazy little chunk of goodness.


Related: Why Have I Never Tried: GooGoo Clusters?

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