Is there a food more closely associated with love and romance than chocolate-covered strawberries? Whether you and your significant other are feeding them to one another over flutes of champagne or, ahem, enjoying them in ways better suited to a NSFW blog, they're kind of the quintessentially-amorous treat this time of year. And just in time for Valentine's Day, Dairy Queen has unwrapped the Choco Covered Strawberry Blizzard as February's Blizzard of the Month.
Sounds enrapturing, right? Plump, red, juicy berries, coated in decadent, exquisite chocolate, mixed up in rich soft-serve vanilla ice cream: What's not to love?
Sadly, like Valentine's Day itself for so many of us, that ultra-romantic imagery doesn't quite live up to cold reality. For starters, the strawberries in my Blizzard were scooped out of the metal canister of sundae toppings. Pre-chopped and swimming in heavy syrup, they were unceremoniously dropped in a cup, to be followed by a scoop of what the chain calls "choco chunks." Most recognizable as what encases a Dilly Bar or chocolate-dipped cone, it's basically Magic Shell that's already shattered into bits. I was under no illusions about DQ using actual hand-dipped berries, but the assembly-line approach sure ruined some of the allure for me.
Taste-wise, it unquestionably evoked the classic Valentine's Day sweet. What I actually wrote down in my tasting notes was, "tastes like VD in a cup," an admittedly unfortunate but pretty funny bit of shorthand.
Still, the flavor, though not off-base, tasted fake to me. The Blizzard's blending process effectively purees any large pieces of real berry that might be in there to begin with; I didn't encounter a single recognizable chunk of strawberry in an entire Large. Instead, I got an overpowering blast of that cloyingly sweet syrup in every single spoonful. It was an artificial sensation, at best.
Still the Choco Covered Strawberry Blizzard should certainly get you and your Valentine through in a pinch. Whether—or how—you choose to incorporate this frozen 'fection into your bow-chicka-wow-wow celebration, though? That's entirely up to you. No judging here.
About the Author: Todd Brock lives the glamorous life of a stay-at-home freelance writer in the suburbs of Atlanta. Besides being paid to eat cheeseburgers for AHT, pizzas for Slice, and desserts for Sweets, he's written and produced over 1,000 hours of television and penned Building Chicken Coops for Dummies. When he grows up, he wants to be either the starting quarterback for the Dallas Cowboys or the drummer for Hootie & the Blowfish. Or both.